I'm back.


After spending 50 days (thats because I had 17 days of MC and one week of Chinese New Year holidays) waking up earlier than the rooster and possibly early enough to wake up the rooster for not waking it up earlier than us, it's very, very, very, very nice to get back to civilization.

Frankly speaking, I didn't really like NS. Yes, I admit, NS is fun. But when you're sick with Chikungunya, struggling to cope with the disappointment that I didn't get to go for JS, the fact that the mission week for JS was in Taiping, my dad's trial, internal conflicts within me. It wasn't easy. And the smoking in my dorm, especially when those ****** smoked in the dorm itself. Did I mention disciplinary action just because only one, YES ONE, did something stupid which was sneaking out to the mamak. I mean, if you want mamak, follow me and the others to church lah! Yes, we buy our own food after church because it ends at 1.00-1.15 p.m.

Not that I want your sympathy. It's just that I can't keep this to myself anymore and I had to spill it out here right now. I became deppressed, and lonely, due to the fact that I found it hard to find friends after losing out 17 days. My deppression was slowly spiralling out of control. I was slowly turning bitter and bitter by the day.

But guess what, God showed me that that wasn't the way to go. And He IS right!

I guess God was testing my faith, just like he did with Job. Seeing if my heart was sincere and whether I only wanted to go for JS just because friends like Tim, Mike, Rosh, Praise, Han Yun, Victoria, Sarah, Alfred, Mellissa and a whole lot more were going, or whether I was hoping for self-praise while in Taiping, after all, Taiping is the place I spent 18 years of my life. Eventhough I never time to think about all of this, I still didn't get to go for JS.

And though the disappointment was so great that I sometimes could cry in the inside, especially during the week the mission week took place, I knew, that by faith, God will lead me out of this trial. And He did!

Reading Purpose Driven Life there reminded me a lot of things. That we're not created for what we want, or for our own purposes, but for Him. Until now I have no idea what was my purpose at NS, I guess one way or another, I might know, someone's life could be impacted.

Church there too was awesome. The people, the messages spoke, especially just last Sunday, when Pastor Sam (the pastor over there) reminded everyone that although the global credit crunch has affected many, he reminded everyone that we should and must remember our blessings, in the form of cash or something else. And yeah, he's blessed me in many ways this past 18 years. And he showed me Wilson, one of my good friends at school, a staunch Buddist, accepted Christ and now worships at EPCC (the church I worshipped at while at NS). He's going for CC (Camp Cameron) as well!!!!!!!! Hallelujah for that!

Well, now that is all over. I'll be heading over to KL this Sunday. Starting a new chapter of my life. It is happening so fast. But I guess it's time to move on, although my poor younger brother is going to miss me like crazy.

By the grace of God, He'll bless me today as I get my results.

Rom 8:28 And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.